RAWR

i was texting dwayne today and took quite some time to reflect on what he said , " haha you're the one who needs to be happy."
i realised that he was right. I do need to stop being so pessimistic about everything in life. But i have no idea why i keep feeling like my life could be so much better than it already is..
Not everyone is created equally, so maybe the pursuit for perfectionism is taking its toll on me. it needs to stop though because i don't really want to tell myself to be happy every single day.
Optimism it is then.

okay first post for 2009.
i missed out the new year resolutions thing but oh well, i doubt i can fulfill them anyway.
School's been mad. i've been having insufficient sleep for the first time, and that's not a good sign, cause i get grumpy and easily agitated when i don't have enough sleep. haha

anyway, on a brighter note, i had a wonderful 18th birthday! carousel was gooooood. even though you guys might have thought that i would have wanted to invite others, i didn't. i was actually happy you all didn't invite them though. it would have been awkward. haha

so this year, i've decided to be a nicer person. hmmm lets see after deciding not to defend myself on my blog from the attacks i got from two other people on their blogs in the past two years, i've realised that i don't have to defend myself, because everyone knows who did what, and what exactly happened and also thanks to my friends who told me not to do anything about it and BE NICE. I was pissed at first cause what was said wasn't true at all, but people asked me about it, and before i told them anything, they knew that it wasn't true. I mean c'mon who would believe a person ,whom everyone doesn't like (up to now)? well enough about it.. i don't need to say anything else. Looking back, i'm glad i didn't do anything about it, but to just cast it aside and ignore it. haha i'm so much happier this way.

doutzen kroes!

WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW

Just as i was going to take back all the things i've said before,
i chanced upon more appalling stuff. you could call me mean, but i don't care, because i don't really like what i've heard last week.

It simply re-emphasizes what i said in the august post. SIGH
and just when i thought i was wrong and too judgemental..

Haha oh well, i knew i was right from the start.

So don't you be coming to me and telling me that i don't know what i'm saying.

I'm just glad that i trusted myself.

If what everyone is telling me is true, then why do i still feel this way?


Why do i have a feeling that it isn't true, even though almost everyone has told me that same thing?


Are they just comforting me, or do they really mean it? i don't know..



If it's true, then why isn't it happening?


"We'll never know, till we try
Don't wanna live a lie "

i almost forgot i had a blog. haha
i feel quite bad after not going to school for like _______
anyway, promos are over finally. yaye
my life is getting really boring now.